you're bored at work aren't you?
I'm toying with the idea of beating off under my desk
I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
The man at the Honda dealership told me I smell like vodka and probably shouldn't be driving.
You kept referring to your penis as "this guy."
dudes here are drinking wine, and not in the forgivable 'just doing this to get laid' way
WHATEVER CLASS IS PLAYING "TOOT IT AND BOOT IT" AT 8:30 IN THE MORNING, I WANT IN.
I woke up smelling like the ciroc you tried pouring into my mouth last night. I think my clothes are still soaked
All I saw was a purple blob and poking out from under was part of a green shirt. Took me a minute to realize it was him under that beast.Thought I should ask if he was actually breathing and conscience but then I saw him slowly exploring what few brave men have done before.
there's still three solo cups of your puke in my basement. so that needs to be solved at some point.
Yes. I will keep putting the beer into my stomach and eventually the bartender will make a mistake
I'm missing my left shoe, and there's a note on my foot (in my handwriting) that says "HAHA BITCH" Any explanation for this?
You tried to pick a fight with a polka band saying that you'd wrap the accordion around their throats
im ready to get drunk and forget everything ive learned this semester
QUICK FAX ME THE BALL
Not how faxing works at all btw
This town reeks of teen pregnancy.
Randomize
