Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
i just had sex with a fat kid who giggles when he cums. tequila really lowers my standards.
Apparently everytime he put me down to bed I escaped out the window, I faintly recall climbing into the canoe in the back yard, and air paddling.
We had sex after spending two hours in the drunk tank. It was really deep and meaningful
he just made me youtube cheetahs running and he thinks he is in a pool
I made out with him with my retainers in. My drunken hook-ups get lazier and lazier.
First if all, whoever designed penis shaped ice cubes is clearly daring me to shove them up my vagina
It's national boyfriend day supposedly, would it be appropriate if I posted a picture of my dildo?
i got to hold a baby today and i loved it and i want a baby but actually i'm going to make an appointment to get birth control now.
I'm going to teach Troy such valuable life lessons. Yesterday I told him to stay away from girls who drink redbull and vodkas.
There should be a Doritos delivery van or something.
I'm pretty sure that my eyebrow is going to be swollen from a sex injury tomorrow and possibly a black eye. If it forms that way it wiil be the second time. Different eyeball. Different decade.
my life is like one bad, slutty lifetime movie.
He made me spaghetti, gave me wine and I fucked him on the floor, Is that a fair trade of services to you?
It's officially "let him eat me out in a sundress with no panties" season. Needless to say the first date was a success.
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