if you call bong hits and onion rings a party, then yeah
One little Beyonce reference and he turns on me faster than liberals on Jon Mackey
The guy I wanted to make out with just got beat up, let's roll.
I don't know but the stairs are covered in apples
I feel like I've been drunk all of June. And I am in NO WAY ashamed about it.
Solid teamwork gives us a good shout of both bringing home trophy cougs
He told me that his favorite part about me is hearing my voice while we fuck. I think that was the nicest thing he has EVER said to me.
How do you tell an ex that banging less hot chicks than me is highly insulting? I almost want to try and get him laid with a pretty girl just to save some face for dating him so long.
You wanna know how bad I feel? I couldn't get out of bed to get the remote, so I just downloaded the comcast app on my phone so I could change the channels
Yep if he's taking selfies he's probably on drugs again.
Do you congratulate someone for having bigger tits, or is that a no no?
You puked on yourself, then demanded to take shower. In which you kept saying "its raining"
Yeah, it was all very half-hearted. In the middle of sex we both just stopped and looked at each other and said, "can we just sleep instead?"
That is so sad.
I'm at the nutcracker high as shit. It's so beautiful. I cried.
And Mike keeps telling Will that love at first sight is true and this is just a shit show. Help.
Randomize