That's what you get when you play shuffleboard drunk.
I do. There's a bald headed guy whose kinda hot. I might rub his head. I've only had 2 beers
all I remember is repeatedly winking at the fire marshall while he was counting the people in the bar
Our halfway to Halloween party needs to never happen again. There were waaayy too many wasted cartoon characters passed out in my living room this morning...
You were fucked up like a footballbat trying to eat gum off your shoe. And that wasn't even the nights lowest point.
fun fact: in my eskimo family tree i am the only brunette
Bartender just fed me brownie. Its going to be a good night
As pissed as she was, you would've thought I was trying to get back into his pants instead of his booze collection.
You're dick is like the main character. It needs its own picture.
This couch is so comfortable I can tell if it's like a waterbed or I pissed myself
Brought some lesbians back to the light side of the force
I need to calm my uterus...
We shall need something stronger. Anal lube, the blood of a giraffe, and a bay leaf should do the trick. Make the paste and cover your left knee and anus in it.
So...a chick sucked my crank...now her dog is licking my feet. I feel like a pharoh on vacation.
My Mini-Van Handjob Milf is leaving the company. I need to find a new job. I can’t handle this place without those handjobs
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