Had a 3 sum last night, and today food just taste better and the air seems so much fresher!
we already have meals planned for the weekend.
SEMEN IS NOT A MEAL.
When I get home we should play "let's see how many Christmas movies we can watch before we start having sex."
My vagina is not really on board with my "emotional issues"
THIS TIME TOMORROW MY VAG IS GONNA BE BRAND SPANKING NEW.
I'm at a nursing home getting weed. Lol when times are tough, things tend to get a lil weird
The nausea has returned and I can't handle such things to exit my body so violently
If I win the contest of drinking the most water I get a chicken nugget.
I shaved last nite, you should see my cock it looks like a beautiful skyscraper
I'm trying to make sure he doesn't drown in the toilet. Because I'm a nice lady.
I woke up to some strange woman rubbing peanut butter on my thighs
NO. NONE OF THAT. SHAME ON YOU.
Your Vodka Saturday privileges have been reduced to Beer until you go a full month without losing an article of clothing.
I've broken 3 vibrators in the past month because I apparently am "too rough" with them. Is that even possible?!
I had more orgasms than hours of sleep this weekend. I’m going to keep him around a while
Randomize
