Well we can cross off dogs, dating sites, and real life as ways to help you meet a chick.
I'm drinking keystone with a homeless man I found. It's making me feel uncomfortable.
i got a blow job in the bathroom during intermission at the hockey game. i'm pretty sure i made Canada proud.
considering how much of last night I don't remember and the amount of ones laying on my desk right now, it's safe to say I'm concerned
Getting wasted on top of a casino. My penis is so much higher than everyone else's right now.
Well. Your father was, shall we say, privately surfing the Internet when he found a video of you and Kevin. This was on a very public website honey.
By the way, Kevin! OMG good catch honey!
True love: he brought me a margarita while I was n the shower. He's a keeper.
But in fairness, I would totally have a robo-penis as long as it had full sensation.
Do you ever get high and look at your cat and feel like you know them on an intellectual level?
I've never been so excited to have my ass in so much pain.
walk of shamed to graduation. ending college with a bang....
I'm sending him pics of me in my new lingerie telling him to come over and when he gets here I'll have changed into like sweats and a 5 year old shirt with ketchup stains on it
Well I didn't get a shacker shirt but I somehow managed to come home with superman socks
I just found a nug casually in my room under my duffel bag. Is this a sign I need help?
You know, I'm starting to enjoy brazilians. One day I'm going to make a therapist very very happy.
Randomize
