Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
plan parent hood is for high school, im at the abortion clinic, so college.
i am officially better prepared for a hangover tomorrow than i was for christmas.
Her birthday cake consisted of a shot of tequila with a candle in it
I have realized now that neither the top nor bottom of a bunk bed is safe for sex....
That was the first time I have seen a confused expression with a dick in the mouth
she is legit wearing a plastic bag around her neck as a necklace. she says it serves two purposes.
Empowerment dancing to Touch Me in the Morning by Diana Ross. Handling this breakup SO well.
I accidentally flashed three cops last night. Stone cold sober.
Did I hit my head yesterday? I have a bump on the back of it. Also I just want you to know that I don't blame you for me taking my bikini top off. If I want to be shirtless no man or woman on this earth can stop me.
I come from a long history of big boobed German, Swedish, and Irish women. And then there's me. Mother nature was like "Naaaaaaah."
I just used a gift card from my in-laws to buy their daughter a vibrator. What even are morals?
I can't tell if my roommate is crying or having sex and the fact that there's anime in the background is only making this more confusing
our moms work together...I can just see the conversation now, hey your daughter ruined my sons marriage, that's probably how it will start.
I swear to god, if you ever yell my name during sex with my sister again..your balls will be stapled to your nipples.
Randomize
