I just saw a man vacuming his front lawn. What is this world coming to?
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
I want a vodka facial right about now. I'm talking about straight vodka bukkake
The bride says you won't want any of the single ladies...
Let's let the open bar be the judge of that.
I'm pretty sure that I'm earning a horrible reputation with your friends, but I'm having a fucking great time in the process.
Omg. I bid $3000 on a cave in Afghanistan on EBay last night.
I left two shots of jager for you guys when you wake up from your death. Do with it as you wish
Yeah. I had to take off my shirt. It's soaked in weakness.
We fucked then made friendship bracelets, his mother taught him right!
That moment when a stripper is the one that makes the two of you have to define the status of your relationship...
I specifically remember rubbing my eyes thinking I could definitely go blind and I really like came to terms with it I was like ok my other senses will develop this is fine
every day is bullshit and fuck everyone. That's my motto for the week
Have you ever eaten pizza and gotten your dick sucked at the same time? Because I have pizza.
Sexy intern needs to have caveman sex with me
Drinking is such a hassle. I wish I could just press a button and be drunk.
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