do you think they ever dumped Gatorade over Michael Vick's head after his dog won?
trying to imitate man vs food after 12 shots doesnt mean youll get laid
Couple in the hotel room next to me keep fucking. When I hear her get close I call the room wait for them to stop and hang up. If I'm not getting any tonight then no one should.
i'm using salt from the free peanuts to stop the bleeding.
Get to the bar. Power hour leading up to the rapture.
yeah people on the adjacent balcony, Im naked drinking outside in 0 degree weather at 1pm. got a problem?
Between the walk of shame, bar fight, karaoke, injuries, number of bar check-ins, and variety/quantity of alcohols and Advil consumed, I'd say HookerFest 2012 was a raging success.
I'm eating captain crunch out of a cup half full of beer so idk
How bad would it be if I wore out the dress we got peed on in. You're the only one who knows.
Hey, I'm renting a storage locker for the summer to keep all my bondage shit in so my parents don't see it. You wanna split on it for your all your weed shit?
last night we were hooking up when all the sudden he just murmured "mm blonde". i don't know what to think about this situation.
Throwing up into Nora's potty chair while simultaneously having beer shits was truly the highlight of my Christmas season.
Literally I can feel my heart beat in my vagina because of how sore I am
So who left their underwear on a lamppost in my aunt's backyard
We were on the beach when you spilled sand in the bottle and said "relax it's vodka, it'll disinfect itself"
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