How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
I hate girls that dress up to come to planned parenthood. I just want to be like we are all in the same boat here, we know your slutty. Its OK.
Can we comment on the fact that at five thirty this morning, security woke me up in the hotel lobby, in my underwear, and some random guys winter coat?
He has a chalkboard tally in his bathroom of "Me vs. Toilet". He's losing.
Well I'm glad to hear the fight wasnt over his small dick.
I stole a road cone for their 13 yr old son. Apparently I told him to put Christmas lights on it, and "treat her like a lady."
I fucked her while she was wearing her boyfriends dogtags. I'm officially a bad american
This could be one of the worst things i've done... The background of her phone is her and her boyfriend.
somehow, even strange, drunk, middle-aged men on the RTA can't understand why he'd choose her over me
maybe it's because you talk to strange, drunk, middle-aged men on the RTA
He pulled out, and the resulting cumstain on my sheets is in the shape of a fetus. The irony of this is both awesome and terrifying.
I'd say you were a shitshow. Playing floating beer pong in the pool you kept filling other people's cups with pool water and laughing to yourself.
Uber driver offered to have sex with me since I went home solo. - rock bottom
Someone just needs to roll me into a blanket burrito and feed me drugs
is it still considered wake n bake if you wake up at 2 pm?
hypothetically, what's the best method to remove an stray semen gob from a roommate's important school document?
Randomize
