first missing my period. then crying at the clinic... but why?
we had sex 3 months ago. you missed your period 2 weeks ago. but nice try.
If last night was a website it would be called poordecisions.com OR uncircumcisedspanishweiner.org
how can you tell if its a queef or a fart from that close?
It was kinda bitchy last night when i brought up my pregnancy scare and you said "shotty playing with it"
I sat on his lap and we shared a beer. I feel like that's an invitation to his dick.
Do you ever wonder how many people have prayed for you to be a better person?
Hey man sorry, can't talk. I'm already taking risks by ripping the bong on this conference call.
i am one more weekend without sex away from dosing him with viagra and locking ourselves into a closet.
He referred to his cock as "The cock" like it was third party or something.
i honestly don't know why someone didn't cut me off after i broke the ceiling lamp with MY HEAD
Apprently after I bit that bouncer, it all went down hill.
crossed #23 off the Slucket List!
YOU JUST MADE YOUR SLUCKET LIST THIS MORNING.
i had a mental breakdown over a math asignment proposed to a glass of chocolate milk then burned my hands when i acidentally leaned on the stove i have the grill marks burned on my hands i can see them
its only been 20 minuts since i last saw you
The girl in the stall next to me is puking her brains out, I'd say she had just a good a weekend as us
I gave her some alkaseltzer ad she looked at me lke I was god
Sex was followed by homemade breadsticks. I waited till after the breadsticks were gone to tell her i had a gf.
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