That's intense
Did your girl go home? Did she have fun? Can we have our friend back?
apparently i'm not the first person wake up and realize she's ugly cuz i tore this house apart and there is no sign of my clothes
): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
He passed out on the patio with nothing on but his boxers. So we put our beer caps on him. Yeah he woke up with a polka dot sunburn.
She brought up feelings... her days are numbered
what is it with giant penises always finding me
You drink it until you puke in a vent one time and it's ruined forever.
He was just lying in his underwear like a present. I had to unwrap it.
I say "glasses of whiskey" like I didn't chug it out of the bottle
Look,the guy had sex w/a Canadian prison guard on the deck of a cruise ship,he could blow any second.
I came to the conclusion that Tinder and having the day off are not good for my relationship.
And I am bleeding like slutty girl #1 In a horror movie
Am I getting cock blocked by karaoke? That's a first.
I turned off my domesticated goddess switch over 2 years ago and idk how to turn it back on. So in the mean time I'll dodge this gf bullet and eat free steak for as long as possible
Randomize
