WHAT IS WRONG WITH SOCIETY?!?!?!
... says the kid who took a shit in my parents dishwasher...
Apparently mid blow job I started crying telling her how "Wonderful this blow job is"
He had in his status he loved beating off and tagged his wife. another reason facebook should be for college.
I think you blew it when you asked her "Do you look good naked too, Or is it just the bra?"
I'm not saying going to the volleyball games drunk on Tuesday night was a bad idea I'm just saying we shouldn't make a routine of it.
Careful when you walk in I'm laying by the door.
having someone tell me to "prepare my vagina" is not really something I want to hear..
Bjs on a first date are the gateway to getting to know someone for who they really are.
Just made a Xanax and ginger ale smoothie. Oh Thursday you are good to me..
All I could think when I saw it was, "All right, Vagina, only one of us is getting out of this alive."
I think we've reached the point in the summer were we need to go back to school. I was so bored yesterday I nearly bought blow dart gun.
I've learned life lessons in Vegas. Mostly, drugs are cheaper than alcohol.
I FINALLY GET TO MASTURBATE. SO EXCITED.
She's lucky her pussy is worth listening to her ramble about bedroom furniture for 30 minutes
I'm so high I have morphed into the monopoly man. Or maybe the Pringles guy. I don't know but I have a mustach now
Randomize
