I went out, and slept with my sunglasses on
she thought the capital of kansas was topanga.
How did you get the entire couch up on it's side and into the bathroom?
Just break the ice by asking who had to take plan b this past semester
There's a point around the one and a half minute mark where the keg stand goes from impressive to pathetic
We found her on a strangers doorstep chanting "I know someone will let me in" it took 2 of us to drag her to the car.
dude when im high using logic is an accomplishment that should be rewarded. make sure u get cinnamon twists
My mom just looked at me while watching the fireworks and asked if it reminded me of how I felt after sex. I'm so uncomfortable.
Using a joint as a bookmark. What is my life?
Saying you need a hooker then asking me to have sex is NOT the way to get laid. Booty call 101.
Don't send me heart emojis when you're jacking off.
She's lucky her pussy is worth listening to her ramble about bedroom furniture for 30 minutes
Not sure how but he broke three of his fingers while giving a blowjob. How does someone that accident prone survive to adulthood?
His Australian accent during sex made me think I was in an Outback Steakhouse commercial
YOUUUU FUCKING FURRYYYY
I DIDN'T COME HERE TO BE SLANDERED LIKE THIS
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