evidently tequilla and lady gaga make me flirt and grind shamlessly with other men infront of my boyfriend.
I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
i woke up in the lobby of Holiday Inn on a chair sitting up straight
margarita scented body wash shouldn't be used the morning after cuervo. there should be a warning on the label.
I wish a night of watching Dear John and a bottle of wine could cure my herpes.
so there is either a lot of blood or a lot of wine in the shower....
I have way too big of a thanksgiving food baby to enjoy any of my old high school booty calls
Had sex with him again...yikes. and the whole time he kept saying "i wish we could do this forever." Forever lasted about 45 seconds
He showed me his night stand drawer...it has one too many sex things in it.
Exactly how many...is TOO many?
Nooo, I ran into two if my exes, both having their engagement parties at the bar. It was like a fucking Eskimo family reunion, but with more tequila.
He then used a box cutter I keep in my car to open the plan b. Who says chivalry is dead?
I'm not gonna swipe right, he has better hair than me. Just no.
I come into the house and he's fucking doing karaoke by himself... Lady gaga
I was grinding with girl while I was eating french fries, and she turned around to hook up with me. She ate my fries.
This is your post bachelor party survival text. This a free and complementary service to make sure you are still alive. For alive, say yes. For hurting, say ugh. If lost, say help. If dead, please feel free to not respond. Thank you and we hope you enjoyed the party.
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