She just told me her legs are numb and that she dedicated her karaoke of ice ice baby to her 4 month old son.
Just a heads up before you get home. Took the shelves out of the fridge so i could fit the beer ball and bucket of riot punch. Apparently i decided the stove was the best place to keep them. They got cooked when we pre heated to cook a bird we shot. This may be the final straw for our security deposit
Overall win. We all know who got to sleep on the concrete outside of Denny's with you.
Only the gays. Guy gives me a handjob in the steam, then changes next to me under his towel
Only the gays
Dude.. full face helmets and hangovers do not mix... I am never going to get rid of the smell of puke.
I'm pretty sure I just need an IV drip of Plan B at this point...
I'm afraid I might run into that fat chick that sucked on me in the hospital parking lot while her friend cried in the car next to us, but I may be willing to take that chance.
I really have to stop having sex with people I sell drugs to...it feels unprofessional
I'm gonna take a crap in the portashitter like a civilized human being.
I didn't want sex last night, but she charmed my dick out of my pants like a snake charmer.
Well my summer has already been productive. I partially caused a divorce.
Soooooo I may or may not have accidentally been a catalyst in a destroyed marriage.
Its like the floor is slow but life is fast?
I see you found the nyquil...
he just got here with a handle of tequila and box of condoms. looks like i'll be spending the weekend in bed
If you left your bike out in front, I just watched some dude steal it.
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