Ok so my english teacher told me i could have 5 absences bc of my "problem". I have no idea what she is talking about
just saw a girl with a lower back tattoo of the boondock saints prayer.. i will marry her
dude, there's a fucking musical in my head. it's fucking awesome being this high.
He insisted on sleeping in my bed. Had he taken all of my obvious hints I would have sucked his dick. He only wanted to snuggle. My world has been turned upside down.
My three rules on what I'm wearing tonight. Something short, something see through, and something i had sex in.
I opened up my wallet and it was filled with puke.
The sound of my own breathing is making my head throb. That hungover.
I told him if he cums in my mouth he has to buy me a cake that says "sorry I came in your mouth"
It is clearly not my fault that you decided studying was more important than trying to bang our hot teacher for an A, so I seized the opportunity.
What kind of terrible faithless God would allow vodka and one ply toilet paper to coexist?
I knew it was Christmas when someone handed me a stocking filled with airplane bottles. Ps just woke up 3 days later
I planned to shave today but it's Friday the 13th I might cut something
I also guarantee you multiple orgasams and blueberry pancakes
It was kind of like hidden Mickey ears, but with dicks.
I know we agreed to cock block each other from now on buttt I WANT this one. I have felt his penis, it is godly, and I am going to have it inside of me, so shut the fuck up and leave.
Randomize
