no more stoned jack in the box. this is the third night in a row.
i just found out that washing ur bong in the dishwasher works. its been a productive day
I'm way to drunk for this play. I'm about to run up on stage and drop the main character
I'd just like to give a shout out to jesus and plan b for making this day possible.
She brought a box of chocolates to give the bartender and now he's giving her free shots.. Why didn't we think of that?
Just received a visit from the Ghost of Bad Decisions Past. Kind of weird 90% of the flashbacks happened in the same sixteen month span, the rest happened at Taco Bell.
Nothing like an alcohol-fueled, 6-hour-long hunt for weed--complete with occasional breaks for sex.
420 is off to a bad start. Mark wake/baked WAY too much, and he has spent over $50 on the claw machine in the grocery store.
How many drinks/blunt hits do you think I could get if I wore an "it's my birthday" shirt
So what your saying is I can use her desperation to my advantage. Fuck, this must be how pretty girls feel.
There's a ton of international students in my suite and I'm just sitting in this chair with no pants on eating frosted flakes
Apparently I offered the cop my Taco Bell.
Desperate times...
Chasing down vodka with apple juice and crying. Alone.
Is it weird that I have your number saved in my phone as baby Jesus?
Standing naked in my kitchen making nachos. I love my youth.
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