and we just had intercourse last night so i'm exhausted, fucked up on adderol, emotionally broken and just pissed
When I woke up his cat was sleeping on my face and i had scratch marks on my neck. not happy.
only room for one pussy in that bed.
i want you to feel like i'm letting you into my heart, not just my vagina.
So I've been thinking a lot since she told me she's prego. But what I want to know is why my voice of reason sounds like Thomas fucking Jane!?
I need some transition time from spring break.. can we day drink between classes this week?
after he came i started crying. just to fuck with his head.
You need to take one for the team and go bang a random sample of mexicans. Cause my internets broke and I can't google mexican foreskin stats.
He came in asked for the bathroom and came out 10 minutes later dripping wet took his redbull and left.
I think online classes were designed around the concept of day drinking.
I'm going to practice throwing things up the the air and catching them between my boobs, because that seems like a cool party trick.
I'm giving great sideboob & it's being wasted on my parents.
I came in and she was laying on the ground just stoking it saying "the floor is where our feet step"
I have nothing to say other than the obvious 'we probably shouldn't have done that' and the less obvious 'i think you bruised my labia major' ...?
I remember eating bacon bits off your chest that night... I'll never look at bacon pizza the same way
Saw my doctor at the bar. He bought me a drink. I think he was looking up my medical record on his phone because he suddenly had to go. syphilis continues to fuck with my life
Randomize