oh my god im such an asshole. i just asked the guitarist of bad religion if he was a scalper.
Also I am about to cut a ringtone from "Sex Machine" so James Brown can tell me to "get up, get on up" in the morning
I once woke up to the scream from 'get up offa that thing' and smacked my head on my desk
I havnt had this much beer since i losodt my virginity. thank. god.
if it walks like a guido and talks like a guido, i'm gonna fuck it.
Either he masturbated at the end of the bed or she gave him a bj. Either way my bed was shaking and I was uninvolved.
She bent the beer can with her tongue. I'm scared of what she'll do to me
We invented "Diesel Bombs." They're supposed to be a bomb, but they come in a 20+ oz. glass and have a blackout record of 6 wins and 0 losses. Undoubtedly going to be the next Muhammed Ali of the drinking world.
I have had more skin than food in my mouth the last three days
Im just saying it can't be that bad if he drove himself to the er. We'll head that way when we finish playing scattergories
Is the party worth it?
I am drink. Beer pony and singing.
We're like a dynamic duo.
Bisexual and Proud, Lesbian and Loud.
yeah...well...life isn't all puppies & lap dances
Cheers to being single today. There's an entire box of franzia with my name on it.
I think clothing becomes optional at the second date! But you seem like a rule breaker
Now, I know I say this a lot, but you've obviously never seen my penis.
Randomize
