Aunt Jean just announced that her pubic hair is getting thicker as her head hair gets thinner. As a family we are just not a people of mystery.
suntimes in life you find a rare opportunity, mine was bonin my gf in front of the tv
The most interesting things happen to you when your pants come down. I truly envy you.
when she was 9 she got kicked out of our 4-H camp dance for pole dancing on the spirit stick
it's like a replay of two fridays ago...except not in a motel and i'm not having sex in the shower.
I wanna get "leaving my dick in charge" drunk.
This girl did not understand, once police sirens go on, road-head needs to STOP
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
Stephen I'm in a lecture and the lecturer just said 'you can CHOOSE to put something in your mouth and swallow it" i'm the only one here who burst out laughing, this is awkward. Thought you'd appreciate it.
They'll never let you practice medicine.
I threw up in my closet when I was hammered last night. Like a fucking toddler. I can't play with the grow ups.
It's meant to be, Cynthia. You, him, and your developed breasts are meant for each other.
I'm currently sitting at your kitchen table eating chicken nuggets that I dug out of the trash and thinking about how much I need to get laid.
(440): please tell me you didn't have sex in my dress.. IT'S A VIRGIN DRESS.
I'm being hhit on by creepy guys please come one bought me a penis hat balloon animal save meeeee
Like, I just want a guy who will drop what he's doing to come touch my vagina whenever I want and to leave me the hell alone whenever I want. Is that SO MUCH TO ASK??
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