If you are in NYC and not seeing anyone, you should come fucke me now because:1 i am not in love with you anymore, 2 i am drunk enough where i won't feel the n eed to kisx you awardly to avoid your beard, 3we have unfinished business that i wpn't get -assed unyil orgass have been had, 4 i really really want to
so i used to love airports for the escalators... now its the bars... then the escalators after the bars
they are using this drunk girl like a spin the bottle in the hot tub, whoever she lands on she makes out with.
yeah, but the first step is admitting you have a problem, the next step is kidnapping him
I'm pretty sure I told everyone in the bar I hadn't had sex in five months. And then I offered everyone calamari.
I refrained from asking a guy what he spilled on his dick because it smelled good. Morals.
It's called being normal.
She just came home holding a fire hydrant. Yes a fire hydrant.
we're going to the olympic park to run the 100m yeaaaahhh
it's 3am. Nothing could possibly go wrong here.
But break dance skills will only take you so far
We had sex in the morning in pregnant lady position. Like fuck me like the hott piece of ass that I am, not your wife of 7 years.
sitting in the kitchen naked and eating stirfry, random dude left my room saying thanks and gave me a bottle of wine. explain...
She doesn't even give a fuck about angle. I seriously gotta start doing like penis yoga or something.
Validation I posted a good pic? The lonely fuckboys send out the booty call signal. Of course I answered the call; Gotham needs its hero.
Sometimes I get confused on who I really actually know and who's lives I just know everything about via internet. Its a fine line
It's beautiful. It's what jesusxwants. I should send you a pic of my boobs out of friendship
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