I just called a phone sex line and you know what I did? I sat there and cried
Well, I fucked her. But the sex wasn't all that great. Morning sex never is
Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
i'm just going to get a pitcher of margarita. sober up by 10. and then do my accounting project
I woke up to him climbing naked through my bedroom window with a bottle of jd in his hand. Of course I had sex with him.
Well last time he got out of rehab he lasted 6 hours. So 3 days this time is quite an accomplishment.
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
i should probably stop thinking with my vagina, and start using that $70, 000 education i can't afford. what the fuck.
Why is there a condom in the dishwasher...
People were drinking out of 26ers with straws, and somewhere someone yelled "fill me with dicks!" I'm home.
Also what is the name of Americas thing where we had a holy obligation to expand westward? I'm going name my new lighter that.
he literally referred to his penis as the alaskan bull worm from spongebob. when can we get married
I mean, you've seen me eat pizza, sober, out of a garbage can, and yet I refuse to go eat at that place. Just sayin....
I woke up with jello shots in pant pockets so I must've had fun
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
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