hey, what are you doing tonight?
sleeping, g'night!
but i wanted to see you :(
sleeping! g'night!(801): i miss you!
stop - you have a right hand - use it!
I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
he wouldnt have sex with me because his guild had a misson on world of warcraft.
know what turns me on? long, stringy hair on a pasty looking girl with an overstuffed backpack and kneepads over her jeans in case she falls off her scooter
your less of a man for seeing that
I'm at Lowes and I'm constantly looking for things to vomit in, just in case
You paid the taxi driver with a comb last night.
Meeting relatives from another state drenched in tequila and smelling of weed. I'm gonna kill you for soaking the only bra I brought in Jose Cuervo Gold.
My professor just told me I'm living a lie and I found puke on my pants. How do you think it's going?
What is their policy on bow ties and belligerence?
I just remembered that last night I seriously contemplated swallowing the cap to my toothpaste
he has the ass of a greek god and he made me breakfast
Apparently 24 hr fitness frowns upon the ingestion of psychedelics on its premises, don't see that in the sign up contract.
who knew rolling through the dorm on a scooter in footie pajamas would attract so many guys. he said i'm his soulmate.
“before I show up tits a blazing, what’s the sexual temperature here?“
Look, I know why you're asking me, but just because I'm gay does not make me a wiki on butt sex. Ask a doctor or you know, the internet like everyone else.
Randomize
