you really need to stop walk of shaming home from theme parties.
i dont know whats so great about being respectable.
I have a very awkward question for you. Could you possibly take my black dildo. My mom wants to clean my room.
You weren't lying about those ceramics students giving the best hand jobs.
Just to clear things up. I did not walk in on him jacking off to your facebook profile.
once you have herpes you dont really care what goes in your mouth anymore.
Yeah I don't remember why I went to the hospital though but I just called and they have my wallet
I brought some guy back to have cheese whiz with me. Then sent him home
Was he satisfied?
No, and very vocal about it.
Pretty sure I just shit out pure stomach acid. I'll explain after you take me to a hospital
He was like low grade Riff Raff, but I hit it. Twice. His grill popped out the second time.
My mom has a bong in her bathroom, but no air freshener.
Her ex was at the party her housemates were having. He knocked on her door asking how she was while we were going at it. Turns out they were trying to work things out. Don't think I'll ever forget his face when we walked out of her room.
Watching the awkward tinder date at the table next to mine is the most action I've had in months, so there's that.
No one with a hairstyle like that is allowed to insult anyone for anything
And then you poured the rest of the vodka into salsa and added the alcohol soaked pineapples and grapes and said "don't touch my salsa breakfast".
Randomize
