Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
i just used google streetview to figure out where i spent the night last night
We got a party bus for the nite. I found out the hard way why stripper poles are meant for girls.
I'm celebrating tres de junio so if you can help me find some sombreros ill be grateful. Also, today in 1992 Aborigines were granted rights to their land so I might need some boomerangs.
apparently the dude across the street has been dead for like a month. now I feel bad about pissing on his lawn
Interesting preview of what next year will be like. Side note, missing a chunk of flesh from my middle finger.
Then you can skip the embarrassing can I date your ex since you're a lesbian now conversation
is it possible i asked you to give me a preliminary pap smear?
I come back upstairs and there he was sitting in a speedo. He handed me a blanket and said "let's cuddle" how is this real life?
T minus 20 hours until we forget our names, find some city cowboys, and g&t into the night.
he pushed me in the lake knowing full well I had joints on me. that's drug-abuse!!
You leaned over to me in the elevator and whispered "how long do I have to pretend to be sober?"
He told me he was my brother roommate in college after we fucked, but already knew that so I had pretend I didn't know that.. like how I pretended I finished. 2/10
I walked outside and found some random guy passed out on our front porch. We managed to acquire the 12 pack of lagers he had so it's all good.
You’ll lick BBQ off my cock but no ketchup on a hotdog?
Randomize
