Like worst hickies ever he always gives them like wtf
You can't special order awesome
Youll never guess who has to go to fucking planned parenthood because trojan cant make a fucking condom
i have a dinosaur tramp stamp
Do you understand how much easier life would be if fannypacks were normal
Dude she's famous. She's on an episode of campus pd. Can't not fuck her
Yes, he made a MIX CD for our booty call...
Tommorow.Eggs Benedict and surprise blowjob day
I will pee on everything he values.
I imagine my service panda will provide sufficient protection. At the very least it will be an irresistible cuddly distraction while I make good my escape.
How many nights in 2015 can we have no one get injured, run away crying, or get into a brawl?
He flew in from NY last night. We had sex in the back of my car in the airport parking lot and then he fed me fresh Babka (from Breads Bakery) as I drove him home. I can't decide if I love him or Babka more.
I just wiped cum off my face with baby wipes... #momlife
its weird getting into a political debate with a pony dressed as an anime character online
I saw the president of my women in business club at the bar last night...I was gonna thank her for teaching me the business skills to create my own fake to get in... then i decided not
Randomize
