if i wake u up at 5am tmrw by coming into ur room wearing nothing but my indiana jones hat and purple socks while singing 'courtesy of the red white + blue' will u be pleased or annoyed
keep in mind this isn't open to negotiation, i'm just trying to gauge ur reaction
he kept farting in my kitchen and blaming it on the dog. then we went to wendy's and he spent twenty minutes in the bathroom. im pretty sure he shit his pants.
you should have known when you found out he drove a mini cooper not to hang out with him.
you made your cat watch a peta video with you, so you could show it how just how good its life is
Keeping my bail papers as a souvenir from when I was arrested. Too weird?
He walked in and put an x made out of tape on the floor. He then announced that he was going to pass out there. Cocky or strategic?
We need somewhere to take these girls. Otherwise it's a orgy in the Mazda.
I don't know, but I don't want you to think its ok to show up at my house at 4 am with a gorilla suit and a bucket of pinnapple and think id be ok with it
I am making a budget for 2012. Should condoms be in the insurance or entertainment category?
WHAT KIND OF SELF RESPECTING 28 YEAR OLD WOMAN WAKES UP IN A FRAT HOUSE?!?'
The cougar kind?
Yea I almost drowned giving a BJ in the shower once
Will you be super villain lesbian lovers with me for halloween?
So now I'm just going to brush my teeth, get high, and go to sleep. Like an adult
Btw I'm playing passed out so you can get laid but obviously you need to take the offense just ask him if he wants to go to bed and leave a cigg on the counter
He just kept repeating "It was like meep meep meep on my balls."
we had to take 10 shots sometime before midnight, then 11 shots between midnight and 1. so yes its gonna be a rough day.
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