I just had to sit down with an 11 year old who threatened to dick slap a girl.
Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
Bad news is im a slut again. Good news is its with people ive been a slut with before.
She called me Spock and proceeded to ask me to 'teach her the ways of the force'. I just couldn't do it after that. No way am I fucking a girl who can't tell the difference between Star Wars and Star Trek.
i hate this class. from the way they're all staring you would think they've never seen a girl in basketball shorts, heels and sunglasses.
He just helps fat girls get exercise. One walk of shame at a time.
I fatbooth all their pics then decide which one is the cutest even if they gained like 400 lbs and then proceed to fuck him.
Remember that time we were in the handicap bathroom snorting Molly at the stripclub. That was a defining moment in our friendship
Watched him slip somethin into her drink. Dragged him of his bar stool, punched him out, and told her what i saw. Bartender used some chemical to confirm presence of rophynol. Just woke up at her place
Also txt me when you take your first dump of the year... I'd like to synchronize if that's at all possible.
Just got a blowie during the Avengers. It's weird knowing that the high point of your life just happened.
I just explained it as we hate everyone in the world more then we hate each other. Thus making us friends. Plus we drink...a lot
I think drinking is the foundation of our friendship
Can you technically cross something off your bucket list if you don't, per say, remember it....?
i got pulled over completely sober but looking like death. dick cop made me do a field sobriety test. he also said "no sober person could have 7 BK bags"
I think people are normalizing furries
Randomize