very cute, but more "I wanna put you in my pocket and keep you as a pet" and less "please bang me" type of cute.
barbara walters just said penis...
My 11 year old cousin is wearing a Jane Austen fan club t shirt. I'm trying not to tear into her, but I'm five coronas deep and losing control.
Just turned rock'em sock'em robots with my little cousin into a drinking game. Im drinking bourbon hes drinking hot chocolate.
There's guys at my school running around throwing potatoes shouting "remember the famine." makes me proud to be Irish.
I swear it's like I have a jerk off quota I have to meet each week. If I miss three days I have a wet dream and it's like a wasted jizz, and it gets everywhereeeeeee.
This exeeds the amount of high I planned on being.
as I was walking out the door her and her roommate started singing "toot it and boot it".. I'm in love
she tried to handfeed me fritos while yelling "PENIS TRAIN"
Dude that girl I hooked up with Tuesday is in lecture. I told her I was from the Dominican visiting my cousin and was leaving the next day. Hiding under my hood and hangover.
hot buttered vodka was not a success. on any level.
Well, remember that night we took shrooms at graces an had to leave immediately to go home and hold each other on the futon and sob for four hours? That bad...
You showed your tits for hundreds of beads but magically became shy when there was food on the line
He'll only communicate through snapchat with pictures of him holding his cat or his dick. Bit of Russian roulette opening them in public but I did it anyway.
She yelled Carpe Diem when she orgasmed. Is it too early to marry her?
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