may or may not have recieved head in the car before we came in.
First straight guy ever blown in a Prius. Congrats.
I interrupted her conversation with, "are we gonna fuck yet?" and she immediately got naked. thanks for the blind date
i'm pretty sure i'm on the same train we took last friday..
what?how do you know?
it appears they have not cleaned up your vomit yet.
You three are like the Bermuda Triangle for morals.
You need to always be prepared. Like a sex firefighter.
oh my god. separately texting an Allie and an Ally while drunk is hard, and I'm climbed 1/2 way up a bridge pier.
He got thrown out for leaning over the bar topless and pouring himself some beer while singing the james bond song
Dude, seduce him with cookies. You almost turned me gay with scones. Don't be surprised when they get you laid.
After some trial and error I found soaking my balls in maple syurip helps ease the pain.
I'm drunk, we're losing, and I'm in the visitors stands. This is about to get ugly.
We were having a serious discussion about Blue's Clues and I just kept thinking, 'you've seen me naked'.
YAY! I just removed my own stitches, and I'm only bleeding from one spot! on a related note, do you think a dishwasher will sterilize forceps and trauma shears?
Please tell your friend to stop shitting in my closet.
I wanna riverboat gamble on your vaginal waters. Just sayin
sometimes i forget what nice tits i have and then i spend a month brushing my teeth naked in the front of the bathroom mirror, and i remember.
Randomize