just gave him road head on the way home IN A SNOW STORM..good thing we didn't crash or I'd be dead. I DIDN'T HAVE MY SEATBELT ON
clearly you have your priorities straight
I just deleted all the drug dealers from my phone, I guess this is growing up
Just watched a drug bust from the Ralphs parking lot while listening to Frank Sinatra. Happy Valentine's Day.
I was rolling balls and tried to donate blood as an act of kindness to the sick person who would receive it
he told her he was actually impressed that she had fucked more people in this house than the four dudes living in it.
If we're single and alone together, the fuck angels shall sing upon our nude bodies.
He wants to take me instead of his girlfriend to the happiest place on earth... By that He meant Vegas. My morals are just loose enough to think this is a good idea
He said that he doesn't like skittles. This relationship is over an it hasn't even started yet.
But wait then while giving his drive thru order he goes in mid sentence, "Hey baby it's Travis remember me?"
3 2 1 whiskey
Still drunk on my morning "run" which has turned into a walk. Just burped fireball
my mom asked if I found my Easter basket. it's 1PM & I got home an hour ago from last night. if I'm looking for anything, it's my dignity.
NO ITS THAT IM A SEXUAL DEVIANT AND CANT FILTER MYSELF
You are cut off. Your giant penis and crazy awesome sex is ruining my body...
Totally writing my paper on the toilet. Makes me miss you.
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