the guy that filmed erin andrews naked got 27 months in jail. Every man that's seen it should send him cigs and a nail file baked in a cake. We owe it to him.
I'm the only adult here not drinking and their 2 year old daughter is trying to play dolls with me.. I've never been so demoralized in my life.
It's sad the highlight of the night was you didn't electrocute yourself again.
Next year we will be 30 and no more shots during the week.
If I take diet pills with my edibles I'll be a perfect person
Delivery driver perk #327: I just paid for part of the security deposit on my new place in pizza. This oughta be a fun renting experience.
All i hear is "BITCH BETTER HAVE MY HONEY" and i turn around and there is a dude in a bear costume. It was fur real.
I wouldn't be too worried. He's been known to chase a chubby before.
THAT IS NOT HOW YOU TALK TO YOUR SISTER
sexting foreigners is the best. they respond with silly things like "love that tits"
No. You're getting a Viking funeral and I'm pawning your shit.
I smoked all his weed and he hasn't noticed yet. But I might need a place to crash when he does
CUT OFF ALL YOUR HAIR COME ON MAN LET'S DO THIS
Turns out I screen transfered my streaming trucker restroom porn vid to the downstairs neighbors'TV instead of my own, damn you chromecast
Just remembered sticking my head out the window as i drove us to walmart and yelling that i was a golden retriever.
Also, sorry for verbally assaulting you when you asked if you could dump the bowl.
FUCK ME I smuggled weed onto a plane by accident
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