The guy asked if i had a problem w/set schedules
This guy has a retainer. We're golden.
Thanks for ditching me last night. I got a ride home from the Dominos delivery guy. You owe me 3 large pizzas.
I walk of shamed back from his dorm in costume while his dad and brother were waiting outside to drive him home. his dad apologized to me. my life never gets old.
There's a walmart bag of my vomit outside my front door. I just really need someone to appreciate that with me.
I'm too hungover to be in a fucking cow suit right now
Can we have a celebratory fuck now that the lockout is over?
You're the best girlfriend ever.
After she saw a msg in his phone from me that listed the reasons why I love his cock, I don't think I can deny fucking her ex.
Our friendship would be less complicated if your dad didn't think I was forcing you into having gay sex with me
He didn't get laid that weekend.. and that is honestly an accomplishment for the rest of us.
I just came so hard I growled. Definitely found my gspot.
Woke up with a squirrel in my bed, how was your night?
Before he left he told me if his girlfriend ever finds out, she'll take us both to an alley and kill us.
you blew the guy with all the harry potter paraphanelia didn't you
It feels like heartburn in my lungs. I'll buy 2 pounds.
Randomize
