You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
Joe is yelling at the trees again.
Repeat the weekend mantra. "I like boys with teeth, I need boys with teeth, I deserve boys with teeth, I will have boys with teeth".
We let him drunkenly pack his own bags without checking them. Yet no one was surprised when the TSA girl pulled a 12 pack out of his carry on.
The creepiest man is serenading me at the bar right now. I had about a quarter of a drink left and the bartender just walked over and filled it with vodka and walked away laughing.
I just blew my weed a kiss
My tuesday consisted of speaking to a federal agent for two hours and watching a roving band of gypsies jump over a fire until 2:30am
CAN I WEAR ASSLESS CHAPS TO SUNDAY BRUNCH OF JUDGEMENT????
Asking me to suck on my nipples isn't going to make me less mad at you.
I lick assholes and I wouldn't eat mdma
I don't really care where everyone ended up, but is everyone alive and not in jail?
Not in jail
Alive?
Lies! You took my virginity, and now my cigarettes!
My school has hired a professional rum bottle juggler for our dining hall this evening.
So I wore my ankle step-counter exercise thingy while I rode him. Don't fuck him- I only burned .2 pounds.
I gave her a cheerful high five and she turned to me and said, "we should do that with our genitals." I may have to marry this girl.
Randomize
