You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
If that was your dad, he is hot
she tried strangling devon with the garden hose. pretty sure they're broken up
From what I hear, her blowjob factory was runninng at full capacity this weekend.
This has been your unwelcomed wake-up call, brought to you by exes united. Have a good day, to opt out please type "STOP", to continue but act as though they do not exist please enter "DON'T CARE" for random daily wake up texts by exes united please press "PSYCHO!"
The cop was yelling at you as you layed on the sidewalk and you wouldn't take him seriously cause you thought it was some dude in a cop costume.
LinkedIn just suggested I might know the guy I caught my wife fucking.
We also had a full on debate about how realistic and useful teleportation and time travel would be...and only used Twilight Zone episodes as "scientific evidence"
Are you still free tonight?
Oh shit I kinda forgot and took acid
I guess I look like the kind of girl who would buy edible, weed-infused lube.
I threw up in a pringles can. how do you think my night went.
I ate the crust off the pizza and left the rest in the box. Even I would hate me.
It's not vacation until I get called "disgustinly sexy" by an fat woman whose older than my mother.
Let's just say, I will never again lick an asshole.
Why is there bacon in the couch?
Randomize
