Just fell off a train. Bad.
dude, i woke up naked in her front yard...apparently i tried to leave in the middle of the night, forgot my clothes and decided,"oh heres a nice patch of grass to sleep on" I think god is up there laughing at me.
.....so he has a son. Josh. That is not his roommate
He woke up next to me, said I "wasn't naked enough" and fell back asleep. I proceeded to blow him.
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
got high to the hills theme song. FEEL THE RAIN ON YOUR SKIN. no regrets.
i'm half naked talking to a cat. you don't have to justify your life to me.
I ate goldfish off your shoulder, I think we had bigger issues
I woke up to him yelling "WHO SLEEPS WITH A BEER IN THEIR HAND?!?" this of course, startled me awake and made me spill the aforementioned beer. So I guess the a answer is- not this girl, not anymore. Asshole
We crashed a rave, threw glitter all over Gay Dan and the bartender, broke a chandelier and called ourselves the Kings of Neon.
He hasn't left the hospital without a nurse's number all year. My nurses are always ugly or men. Wtf bro
Some daaay... Bet your bottom dollar that some daaay you'll do that mollyyyy
The only thing you accomplished yesterday was dry humping me on the floor of my work place WHILE I was working.
if by making eggnog you mean drinking all the spiced rum, then yes, she's making eggnog
The bouncer just called me magically delicious... apparently I'm a lucky charm. hollllleeeerrrr!
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