Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
I puked while I was brushing my teeth this morning and had to get a new tbrush
Ew, did you brush them again?
Yeah but i puked on the new one and decided to give up...failure
if reincarnation is for serious, i better be a guy in my next life
with a huge shlong
massive. i wanna make bitches cry
i walked into his room and he was eskimo kissing his weed..
just to let you know, its not cheating if i cant feel my hands.
She said her hobbies include bangin guys on one night stands and then sending them facebook relationship requests the next morning just to freak em out
Just got a picture message from my sister of the two of us wearing cowboy hats and pressing our bare asses together. Do you remember enough to explain?
It was just a friend comforting a friend. Except his penis was inside of me.
Someone touched my vagina when we were out last night. The fact that it was you is inconsequential and I am still counting it as a pull.
Drinking Patron always ends with me puking or receiving anal. So make your move when I start ordering it.
You attract beautiful men with jobs. I attract ONE WITH A SOUL PATCH.
it was a sexy soul patch.
i love how you just walk into that dealer's house every time without knocking, yet you don't even know his name
I said no to friends with benefits because it was too much commitment
I'm not saying I love you. I never said I love you. I said that if earth blew up like Krypton you'd be the only person I would like to have inside me when our bodies burn up in a fiery inferno
Listen all I know is that mistakes were made and she stole the car and drove half an hour for food at 4 am
Randomize
