You're the host. Of course you wear the diaper. It's like wearing the pants.
I just want a better ending for myself. Not walking around with one sock on and my bush hanging out.
I mean I woke up wearing my bathing suit which blows my mind
Just found a picture of a hobo making out with her tits...a HOBO
When hitting a Woodchuck bottle with a machete, glass will fly back and cut your face.
I hope you did not try this.
you really need to stop getting laid in my dreams more than i do.
Drank a beer through my butt, how's your initiation going?
lesson learned.. dressing up like a naughty teacher doesn't mean you can get away with spanking a cop with a ruler for being "fresh" with you
He pulled a kid having a seizure out of a car and stayed with him until the ambulance came.
he what???
Not kidding. My ovaries cannot handle this shit...swear next time he'll rescue a bunch of pound puppies and hand them out to lonely orphans.
Last thing I remember is ranting about hating pants. Woke up this morning pants less. Couldn't find them, decided to leave. Driving without pants is surprisingly liberating.
Nothing says "back to school" like walking in the first day with a hangover
Jimmy johns delivers to the bar behind work. Happy vodka day!
oh so have I but I'd still suck a dick or 20 in the name of freedom.
I met someone else! And I had a wonderful orgasm! And he wants to see me again, like take me out!
the roommate is literally cooking green eggs n ham, and I'm too hungover to see straight. Dr Seuss nightmare.
Randomize
