So A**** bought my story about how my hickey was a bruise from wrestling
on one hand i'm glad that i'm not in trouble...on the other hand i realized that the reason i cheat on her is because she is so stupid
Hooked up with my old baby sitter last night, so what do I do? As I was sucking her tits I decided it would be a good idea to say " goo goo gah gah"....it wasn't a good idea.
I mean i might have to drop this class tomorrow. I just walked into a midterm
i just know my balls have never hurt this bad before
dpoing straight shots of jhameson. boys are imp ressed. i apologize
There is a bruise on my cock the size of a golfball. Bad sign.
That was around the time you tried to kick me out for being rude to your fish.
We are cuddling. She is so cute when she is too high to be a loud bitch.
Before we rave about the healing powers of your penis, remember it nearly killed me as well.
Reminder: You could have had sex with me while wearing a tiara.
I kinda got drunk and threw my debit card into a bonfire so I don't have any money at the moment lol.
The NSA quit spying on phones. I'm sending you SO MANY dick pics.
Talk about having your cake and eating it he has basically demolished the whole fucking bakery
Good to know. If our sexting moves past early 1900s vernacular, I'll be sure to use that once or twice.
I've finally done it. I finally achieved my lifelong goal of becoming that awkward lesbian in high school who went on to have sex with more women than any of her male classmates.
Randomize