i swear to god her finding her clit was like looking for a sock in a dryer full of beach towels
it always starts out as a suggestion then three hours later I have cum in my eye.
watching hot guy on train scrolling with his blackberry's track ball... o to be that track ball...
These 5 days benders will be the death of me. Just living and breathing is a struggle right now.
How did currency from Costa Rica make it's way into my wallet...?
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
I already ran out of vodka but I have more beer. I just ran naked into the high school party down the street as took all theirs. ...figured no one wants to tackle the naked guy..
Found half of a five day old piece of pizza behind my dresser. Apparently it was drunkenly set there and got knocked down. It was such a happy reminder of last weekend.
I found a cheeseburger next to my tub once. It's there to shame you, but it always just makes me feel more awesome.
I just want to have such an intense orgasm that my heart stops and I die. I mean that would kind of suck for the guy I'm fucking but then again he could be like "I'm that good"
An don't say it's "personal preference" cause I don't buy it. I just want to have normal cool guy balls. I don't want to be the dude that's still rocking the equivalent of the "mid 90's bowl cut" of scrotum haircuts.
that is terrible, if I can't drink Gatorade when I'm hungover I don't wanna live in this world. that's like denying wild rams to run free in the wild and frolic
You answered, dry heaved into the phone twice, & then hung up on me.
So my family just woke up on Easter morning and shared a bowl. That's bonding😊
Everything is bullshit and I hate everyone
Dude did you see that video of yourself crying while bathing in vodka on YouTube?
Randomize
