Are they still out there making out on the couch? How can we get them to leave?
I 'm gonna go stand naked in the kitchen with a knife
i feel like a thai whore the morning after the navy left.
dunno bout you, but i grow tired of beef curtains
We sat in your minivan all night in a parking lot pretending we were in the magic school bus going to the sun
my dad told me i had to spend my money wisely..so i spent the money he gave me for a desk chair on weed. ill be so high i wont even notice its gone
i cant be the least bit upset about his new gf cause all i think is that she has to put things in his ass
I think I should have my paycheck direct deposited to the bar
I was giving him head and when I deep throated him he screamed out "Ohh, top ten!"
oh, you know. just sitting in my bed high as fuck wearing a windbreaker and watching british tv.
i know i said i'd always be there for you, but i'm beginning to think that what you call "being there for me" the american judicial system calls reckless endangerment.
when seducing a hipster, do you think taking a nude pic on a lomo-camera app would increase my chances? grainy off-colored boobs and telling him how much i like reading salinger?
the bride at the wedding we just crashed said we can stay only if we strip for her. You need to get down here
I still don't know his name but his ass is spectacular. Like he should never wear pants.
dave might be using McDoubles to pay for dances
he has gotten at least 7 lap dances out back
There's a fly in my room repeatedly throwing itself at my window, and I feel it's really symbolic of what I want to do with my future
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