And no, shaving doesn't make it look bigger, either
Have you come up with a team name for the beer pong tournament on Saturday?
We can be the stepdads. If anyone asks why say because we beat you and you hate us.
Every single piece. I examined every single square inch of this peanut butter and jelly sandwich. and fell in love with every inch. that high.
I probably wouldn't hook up with him if I had to deal with more than his penis. i think cumulatively we are up to a minute of actual conversation this week.
I feel like I'm on let's make a deal. should I go with what's behind bulge number 1 or bulge number 2?
he also bled all over my floor. unrelated to cats but true nonetheless.
so I am that guy with the red solo cup in class. someone has to step it up.
It's all fun and games until some random starts jerking it on the deck.
He told me he loved me. I didn't know what to say so i just squirted the baby oil at him
I think I just smoked a piece of your foot. Were u picking your feet by the weed?
Some guy I've never met before just came outside and started rolling a blunt on our fence and passed it around to all six of us. At eight in the morning. Today's gonna be weird.
Dislocated my knee during sex, popped it back in and kept going. Then got simpathy chipotle out of it too.
I'm high. The text bubbles floating do no justice to the underwater experiences
I just feel like I'm worth a little bit more than your recycled nudes...
I'm shopping for Mother's Day cards while waiting for my herpes medication. What is life.
Randomize
