I was hooking up with him in my car, he wouldn't stop with my nipples, I had to literally beat him off of me. He kept groaning too while he was doing it. Sick.
Mommy issues
I just found that girl ____ on facebook, her activities include "church nursery" yikes
I went from sexy to sloppy in a matter of minutes
I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
He dated me before I started drinking. I feel like he deserves a consolation bj for all the effort he had to put in to get in my pants.
Well, I didn't bring a notebook or any paper to class. Should I take notes on the sugar packet, lace thong, or condom wrapper that instead are in my school bag?
Maid of honor is brides sister and single. Likes lemondrops. You're welcome.
Why are there jello shots in the kitchen drawer?
I do not mind being torn from the first touches of sleep to see a man who looks like that
Apparently it's not a "bonding moment" when you realize you use the same porn site as your boyfriend
You also spilled beer on my dog and tried to wipe it off with a paper towel but he kept getting away from you.
Whats a little naked between friends. Just don't laugh or I'll be scared for life.
She said she was sober from drugs for a week. All I heard was Kenny Loggins singing Danger Zone.
When I woke up this morning I swear my mouth tasted like dick and rolaids.
You left me with 12 red bulls and a bottle of vodka. What did you expect?
Randomize
