What is the pluralization of human? I just got humen rejected, and I am going completely blank...
once i realized i was actively trying to drink the beer i was sweating out of my body i knew it was time to go to bed
I was high enough to think that mac-n-cheese w/ ketchup, tortilla chips w/ ketchup, and milk was a fancy dinner
Did he make you just lay your head next to his cock and talk to it again?
The bartender gave me the kids toys. Paddle ball & a gecko.
Warning: at some point today you will probably see several pics of me 69-ing a blow up turtle show up on facebook. Just disregard them.
Shirtless guy staggering down the sidewalk, puking into a Prada shopping bag. Ahhh, the walk of shame in Boystown.
Should have know they were on something when he started filling a Togo container with fruit
I have feelings that need drinking.
I just put Gatorade in my wine, cause electrolytes, you know.
this is the last time i am going to a 7am booty call
don't give me stepladders when i'm stoned.. i woke up to a slice of balogna nailed to the ceiling
4 pharmacies and not one had Plan B. If this is gods way of telling me it's time for a child, he can fuck off.
And he put my hair in my clip while i blew him...and he did a good job
Is that your Nuva ring on the floor? Shit must have gotten crazy
Randomize