I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
There's a hobo dancing by himself. Is anyone going to ask how he got in the house?
Currently listening to 'Just Put it in Your Mouth.' remember when i went through that phase?
Can we reminisce? I held a mans penis while he peed. This is the craziest night I've ever had.
something about eating while taking a crap just doesn't seem safe to me.
Hey do you have a way to post bail? If not we can hook you up. If a police officer is reading this please ask him and respond in a timely fashion. I am concerned for my imprisoned friend
She gave me a foot massage while her friend rode me. Your gf puked into the oscolating fan. How were our nites alike?
Idk. Im in a bed. the walls are wood. There's a deer mount.. im afraid to turn over and see who's next to me but he's violently cuddly.
Sitting in the library studying = googling how to get laid in the library.
The tequila covers up the fact that the choco liquor tastes like sadness.
yeah, never be friends with someone with shitty eyebrows.. they obviously already make poor life choices
She said it was unconventional for me to yell "Shazam!!" when I came inside her.
well apparently i sat in the bathroom staring in the toliet at my vomit. it was blue. how was your night?
the fact that I've been his fuck buddy for a year, and I'm pregnant isn't bothering me. the fact that he didn't tell me about his girlfriend does.
I am not even ashamed to say it, I got laid in the stairwell of the hotel, by a 29 year old. It was awesome!
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