Think I'm gonna go cougar hunting tonight... Any advice?
condoms and good judgment
Can I buy both of those at the same store?
So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
there are so many fish in the see you have left to fuck
Hey! Thanks for asking, but it didnt go well. He threw up in the car on the way to dinner. Blind dates arent for everyone.
Why do you apologize after every time we have sex?
Before we started fucking, he laid me on the bed, and asked my what my sleep number was, so that i would be "comfy"
I just got while a charlie horse while orgasming...most confusing feeling ever...
I just realized that I'm gonna have to lower my standards if I want random head.
She's running around bumping into to people trying to keep a balloon she filled with vodka in the air. Please tell me she has a secret off switch you didn't tell me about.
if you ever get a chance to, fuck in a lecture hall. great acoustics. highly recommend it.
Alright we have to be drunk.before noon tomorrow. Its a new law i just got passed through congress. It goes into effect imediately
Found a fruit roll up in my pocket this morning. This means my daughter has a peach blunt wrap in her lunchbox.
What's life without a pregnancy scare?
never stay at a party until 5am. even if it's because of daylight savings. we ended up having to watch porn with the host's dad...
Just sold my panties for 40 bucks to some rando dude at the gay bar. I think I found a way to fund next years spring break trip. Hello cancun!
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