youve choked your chicken with your arm asleep and acted like it was some1 else right?
Last night I had a dream we played Uno and had sex. You won at Uno, but you lost at sex.
I Just realized that having a picture folder that says "not for mom" may give off the wrong impression to wondering eyes
There are some college kids out at 4 in the morning dragging each other on a sled behind a bike. its too entertaining to call the cops
We could make it a date. Dinner and a show. The show being my nipples getting pierced.
When I start puking tomorrow, just let me be. it'll start around 8:35. just let me heave. i love this part of my morning.
I puked in the urinal of a bar tonight. Not embarrassed cause I got away with it, legitimately upset you weren't there to make fun of me.
I just remember being in the bathroom alone cussing out the bunny
I don't know at which point last night turned terribly, terribly wrong, but it was somewhere around Motel 6, specifically the parking lot.
The kind of drunk where you put two tampons in thinking that it'll last me longer ...
To give you an idea, there's a group upstairs trying to break down a door with their fists and heads.
Of the 4 nights I've gone downtown this week, I've been "piss in the parking lot" drunk 5 times
I got into the shower with my underwear on. I just sat down in the tub and tried to figure out when I lost all control of this hangover.
Wound up hungover. Visiting 4 y/o nephew suggested cookies and milk and playing Kirby with him with the sound down. This kid is going places.
She said "Im going to hug you" tried to give me a hickey then said her life sucks and started to cry.
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