I used a bag of wine as a pillow last night.
woke up 7 floors down in the lobby...i my underwear. New high or new low?
New experience?
Im drinking a beer thats called vuuve which is boobs in begian. I think my life is complete.
Just heard a guy discussing with someone else the amazing blow job you gave him. I’m in New York. Over 2 hours away from where you live. I have never been more proud.
it's a little hard to watch the basketball games with my family considering they keep cheering for the guy that i had a one night stand with...
Some advice...don't play drunk rock em sock em robots. With actual people. I have bruises EVERYWHERE.
I think she's going to be dangerous to drink with, but I'm ready for the adventure.
Oh shit. My drunken car sex is on Google Earth.
I love being high. The owl outside stopped who-ing and I could swear I just heard someone say, "Okay, that's a wrap!"
You dove at him but passed out mid dive. Shame it wasnt a costume party your superman suit wouldve been clutch in the situation
So changing channels while she's on top is frowned upon. It's back to thinking about baseball again.
Harry Potter pub crawl tonight. You know you're living your life right when your check list for the evening is wizard robes, wand and acid.
I've been getting a lot of emails from patron lately for being a great customer. Is that awesome, or should I start thinking about seeking help?
I'm not too sure what happened last night, but by the looks of it, we must have gotten drunk with zebras.
my friends roomated asked me this morning if we went to mcdonalds last night and i had no idea...that is until i checked my purse and found half a mcdouble in it...
Randomize