i think guys who wear condoms are gentleman.
you said "tonight pinky, we take over the world" and then came in my face
he said he wants to do me james and the giant peach style. im afraid of what that means. but moderately excited. wish me luck.
He looked at me and said "Last call" before putting his penis away into his boxers
Saxophones in my mind. I swear someone dosed me.
I spent most of the night trying to drink out of three bottles of beer at once. I don't have to be told the reasons I'm single
Why does my jaw hurt?
I may have punched you.
Is it okay to send him a "thanks for the sexual awakening" note?
Apparently nick called me at 3 in the morning looking for you because you ate your keys and ran away..do I need to call an ambulance.
So my roommate just came out of the shower with a dude...guess that answers all questions as to whether or not he's gay
I wish I knew the extent of my injuries before I climbed over the fence. Might have avoided the need to purchase a cupholder for my wheelchair.
Well yeah. But im not sure i trust the black out drunk high girl giving life advice
I am not walking across campus just to give you a blow job in the hopes that in return i can study more efficiently.
I trusted a fart in Toronto. NEVER TRUST A FART IN TORONTO.
I miss your drunken presence, and strong odor of hard liquor and potent weed.
Randomize
