i think i've said "don't judge me" 10+ times tonight... is that a bad thing?
yes
... don't judge me
Well, I guess this was as good a night as any to find out I don't know how to use my fire extinguisher.
After grabbing my boob for a couple minutes he then decides to ask me if I was awake.
I have now hooked up with 8 of the Apostles. I have no idea where I'm going to find a guy named Bartholomew.
Just went through ex bf's and hook up buddys and liked pictures of them on facebook. A friendly reminder that I will be back in for the holidays
she always winds up in the cupboards its nothing new.
And then out of the blue she sent me a youtube video mashup of cats puking to techno music
Her vagina smelt so bad I lied and told her that I was married just so that she would leave.
we broke up because he couldn't handle the fact that i've slept with more girls than he has. also, i've slept with the girl he's seeing now.
HIV testing and a light brunch. Sounds like a great way to spend Christmas Eve.
Maybe you'll have a Christmas miracle
I just found a weed leaf in my leg hair..
Topless Tuesday? One of us will be really happy the other not so much.
We'd like to invite you to our threesome! Lingerie is encouraged and drinks will be provided. Next Friday, roommate night, my bedroom. Hope to see you there!
What doesn't this kid understand that our relationship is not going past the blacked out blowjob I gave him on his birthday?
Somehow, walking in on your drunk mom in a diaper was the least traumatic thing I saw last night
Randomize
